Loving God With My Mind...

I am reading a book about loving God with all your mind, and I must say, God is using it to change my life.

The other day I had to come to terms with myself about what was going on inside of me. Ever since I was little, I have battled with destructive and dark thoughts, and emotionally I have been unpredictable and out of control. In other words, I struggle with depression. I think it is more spiritual than physical, although I have no doubt that changing my diet and exercising will help me immensely. But I had to recognize that I have a problem....and for the first time get serious about fixing it.

First things first, I looked to God. I have hit rock bottom and been in an emotional pit,feeling like it would take a miracle to get out. So I prayed for a miracle, I prayed so desperately and fervently that God would see my despair and help me. I knew that I had reached my breaking point, that it was time to get serious or otherwise, I would continue to live my life like I have so far, which I refuse to do.

My mom practically forced me to read this book, Elizabeth George's "Loving God With All Your Mind" and I knew right away that God was going to use this book to help me overcome my overwhelming thoughts and destructive behavior. It has spoken to my heart so much since I started reading it, convicting me to the core and giving life changing practices to live by. The best one is reading God's word and not taking it as a suggestion. The verse Phillipians 4:8 says to think about what is true and real. This statement alone rocked my world. I spend so much time dwelling upon things that are not true or real....I get caught up in unforgiveness towards others and myself, living in the future or things I could have done in my past,and second-guessing other peoples intentions and behavior instead of trusting God and BELIEVING. I have to be black and white with myself...God's word is not a suggestion! When it says to only think upon what is true and real He means it, and to give myself the freedom to second guess God's word opens the door for the enemy to get in and fill my mind with things that aren't true. And like the author wrote in her book, "you don't have to feel forgiven to actually be forgiven." Since when did my feelings determine whether God's word is true or not? I am a new creation in Christ, and I can overcome anything and climb out of any pit and enjoy the life God has given me because in Christ I can do anything! I don't have to be tossed around like the waves in the ocean, I can surrender my thoughts to God, believe in His promises, live by His Word, and be free!