I started wondering at church tonight if I live my life with gratitude. If someone had to describe my life in one word, would they use the word gratitude? It encompasses so much. I think its a lifestyle more than certain word usage. Its more of an attitude than simply saying thanks all of the time. Does God look at my life and think that I am grateful? The Bible says that you will know a tree by its fruit. Do my actions speak louder than my words? Just because I say thank you, do my actions say something else entirely?
Think about it... if we are thankful for all God gives us in life, it means we are content. We don't ask for more unless we believe God wants us to, and we don't think we should have less than God gives us because that would mean we somehow know what we need more than God does. If we are thankful, then His grace, mercy, and sacrifice would be enough. Complete satisfaction in who we are in God, thankful for our bodies, our minds, our gifts and talents. We wouldn't pick ourselves apart, doubt God's will, or try to rush it. We would simply be thankful.
Gratitude is such a heavy word. Its not a quality you can fake as a Christian. As I was wondering tonight, I thought to myself..." If I am truly thankful for the Cross, why do I continually act like its not enough? Because if it was enough, my actions would convey that message." It's easy to say thanks, it's harder to live it.
Sunday, March 30, 2008
Saturday, March 29, 2008
People Watching....
Today my mom and I participated in a community garage sale. I helped her set up the tables at our neighborhood's clubhouse and get all of our "junk" spread out. The sale started at 8 this morning, and like clockwork, people showed up and flocked to the tables. I was only going to stay for a few minutes, just long enough to help set up, but I decided to hang out with my mom and keep her company. Also, I thoroughly enjoy people watching. In fact, I love it.
If it weren't so cold outside today, I think I could have stood at that table and watched people "hunt" all day. The way they approach the table, scan it slowly and methodically, walking by ever so casually, and decide whether they like what they see on display. Maybe its so funny to watch at a garage sale because its your stuff they are deciding if they want or not. Its like it was good enough for you at one time, will they decide if its good for them now? I love how people stare at something, pick it up, examine it , and I am sure they will buy it...but then to my surprise they set it down. I wish I could hear the dialogue inside a person's head....
Why is it so fun and entertaining to people watch? Is it because human behavior is so predictable and irrational at the same time? For example, several people today bought real junk from other tables, probably spending five dollars on three pieces of worthlessness, because in their mind they are getting three things for five dollars. But at our table, where the "junk" was potterybarn and southern living stuff we didn't need anymore, five dollars for one vase was simply too much.
Maybe I am majoring in the wrong degree.....
If it weren't so cold outside today, I think I could have stood at that table and watched people "hunt" all day. The way they approach the table, scan it slowly and methodically, walking by ever so casually, and decide whether they like what they see on display. Maybe its so funny to watch at a garage sale because its your stuff they are deciding if they want or not. Its like it was good enough for you at one time, will they decide if its good for them now? I love how people stare at something, pick it up, examine it , and I am sure they will buy it...but then to my surprise they set it down. I wish I could hear the dialogue inside a person's head....
Why is it so fun and entertaining to people watch? Is it because human behavior is so predictable and irrational at the same time? For example, several people today bought real junk from other tables, probably spending five dollars on three pieces of worthlessness, because in their mind they are getting three things for five dollars. But at our table, where the "junk" was potterybarn and southern living stuff we didn't need anymore, five dollars for one vase was simply too much.
Maybe I am majoring in the wrong degree.....
Friday, March 28, 2008
I need to work on that....
I am a stinky sinner. No seriously, I am a fallen human being full of really repulsive sin. Ugliness has been oozing out of me lately, and even worse than that, I have become aware of it!
Its a terrible thing when you realize just how "not all together" you are. I have been a Christian the majority of my life, and yet I am SO not together. Recently, it seems like everyday is a golden opportunity to show me how imperfect I am. I think thats what keeps me from blogging.....I am terrified to see my dark thoughts written for all to see. But yet, I will write, because admittance is the first step to recovery (no, people, I promise I didn't learn that from AA).
These days, I have been struggling with annoyance. Certain people have just flat out been annoying me. Then I noticed that the people's behavior I have been annoyed with is stuff that I do on a regular basis.I do that so much! I get mad with other people for doing the exact same things that I do. I am annoyed with myself! Its a vicious cycle and it has hurt friendships and relationships with my family.The conviction has really set in. And conviction is only as good as what you do with it. So recently I find myself saying "I need to work on that" a lot. Thankfully I have friends and certain family members who love me and patiently correct me while I am going through this phase. I am tired of smelling my own stink!
Its a terrible thing when you realize just how "not all together" you are. I have been a Christian the majority of my life, and yet I am SO not together. Recently, it seems like everyday is a golden opportunity to show me how imperfect I am. I think thats what keeps me from blogging.....I am terrified to see my dark thoughts written for all to see. But yet, I will write, because admittance is the first step to recovery (no, people, I promise I didn't learn that from AA).
These days, I have been struggling with annoyance. Certain people have just flat out been annoying me. Then I noticed that the people's behavior I have been annoyed with is stuff that I do on a regular basis.I do that so much! I get mad with other people for doing the exact same things that I do. I am annoyed with myself! Its a vicious cycle and it has hurt friendships and relationships with my family.The conviction has really set in. And conviction is only as good as what you do with it. So recently I find myself saying "I need to work on that" a lot. Thankfully I have friends and certain family members who love me and patiently correct me while I am going through this phase. I am tired of smelling my own stink!
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